Jo Swinson ‘well up for a bit of mass murder’

Liberal Democrats leader, Jo Swinson, confirmed last night that she is totally fucking down with the idea of indiscriminately murdering millions of defenceless civilians in a colossal fucking fireball. In addition to the instant vaporisation of millions of men, women and children, Ms Swinson was also quick to state that she'd be totally chilled about … Continue reading Jo Swinson ‘well up for a bit of mass murder’

“My only problem is a surplus of decency,” argues suspected child rapist

A man suspected of raping underage girls argued last night that he continued his friendship with a man proven in a court of law to have raped underage girls because he was simply too principled to end his association with the aforementioned nonce. The man, who cannot be named for legal reasons, but who we … Continue reading “My only problem is a surplus of decency,” argues suspected child rapist

Outrage as Jeremy Corbyn suspected of not having ‘LEST WE FORGET’ tattooed along the top of his cock

Jeremy Corbyn sparked fury today as it emerged that he was vanishingly unlikely to have any kind of statement supporting Our Brave Lads And Lasses indelibly marked into the north-facing portion of his old chap.  According to an exclusive report by the Daily Express, the words ‘lest we forget’ do not appear anywhere along the … Continue reading Outrage as Jeremy Corbyn suspected of not having ‘LEST WE FORGET’ tattooed along the top of his cock

In defence of the true victims of Me Too: I will not desert you

The news that women have finally achieved true equality could hardly be more welcome. Who could fail to be uplifted by the realisation that fifty percent of the world’s population are now, without exception, paid what they are worth, able to express ideas without being shouted down by the other fifty percent, and free to … Continue reading In defence of the true victims of Me Too: I will not desert you

Episode 12

Max talks about Brexit, general elections, Number 10 sources and the LGB Alliance. Contains frequent strong language. RSS feed: https://spilleroftea.com/category/podcast/feed/ Apple Podcasts: Click here Financial contributions: Gratefully received here

Man who has trouble predicting entirely predictable things somehow still alive

It has emerged today that a man who is unable to foresee the most obvious shit imaginable has somehow managed not to die, despite his prolific and unrelenting stupidity. Rod Purley, an irredeemable twat who makes a living running the BBC into the fucking ground, has somehow managed to remain not deceased for a period … Continue reading Man who has trouble predicting entirely predictable things somehow still alive

Puppies, poultry and self-immolation: an object lesson in being careful what you wish for

Imagine wanting something so badly that you’ll do anything to get it. Dishonesty, disloyalty, racism, homophobia, the steadfast promise to deliver something you know in your heart is intrinsically repugnant: nothing is off the table in your quest to lay your hands on that which is rightfully yours. Imagine then, that you finally achieve your … Continue reading Puppies, poultry and self-immolation: an object lesson in being careful what you wish for

Adopting a puppy not a cure for being a prick, warn researchers

Arseholes will continue to be arseholes even after the adoption of a small dog, according to research published today. A University of Slough paper states that traits such as disloyalty, misogyny and having hair that looks like you’ve just been fucked in a privet hedge by a 300 lb gorilla remain entirely unaffected by pet … Continue reading Adopting a puppy not a cure for being a prick, warn researchers

Straight Pride event a roaring success, insist sweaty virgins

Attendees of Boston’s first annual Straight Pride parade have declared the event a resounding success, as up to three dozen rat-bearded, sexually inactive basement-dwellers took to the streets to exercise their constitutional right to parade their toxic white masculinity in front of a bemused and much larger crowd of non-dickheads. The tragic cockfest unfolded before … Continue reading Straight Pride event a roaring success, insist sweaty virgins